October 27, 2009

You Are The Best

Our mission in earth is to make you happy. But today, you made us happy. And it feels very good. That's why we were unable to pick a winner on the "ELBA ESTHER IS UGLIER THAN..." Joke Contest. We were overwhelmed by your humor. Our Editorial Staff has been in meetings all days and decided that everyone who took part will get a 25,000 points bonus. And also, that you should pick the winner. Why? Because we are tired. Don't want to vote? We don't give a fuck.
Just joking.
So please, vote on the Poll here to your right. And let everyone know how good they are.

June 1, 2009


You'll Find An Old Friend You Haven't Seen In A While. Avoid Him. Pretend You're Blind. He's More Successful Than You.

Avoid Rain. You Look Like Shit With Your Hair All Wet.

Avoid Daylight. You Look Like Shit Today.

Try To Sing A Happy Song. But Please Do It In The Shower Where No One Can Hear You.

Those Empty Desks Near Your Office Are Robots In Disguise. Destroy Them. Then Fight Boss.

If You're A Student, Quit School And Become A Bull-Fighter. If You're A Bull-Fighter, We Don't Like Your Pants.

Create A Beautiful Garden Inside Your House. Smell The Flowers And Admit Once And For All You're Gay.

You'll Create A Musical Masterpiece That Will Transform The World. Then You'll Lose The Tape And Paulina Rubio Will Use It.

No, You Can't Have Dessert. Go Exercising Or At Least Change Your Fucking Wardrobe.

Enrique Peña Nieto Loves You. Not The Governor, But A Cab Driver From Azcapotzalco.

You'll Get A Glass Of Water That Tastes Like Shit. Pretend You Love It. When She Stops Laughing, Your Enemy Will Respect You.

You're Talented, Beautiful And Sexy. Well, Not Really. Just Pretend You Are And People Will Hate You. You'll Think It's Envy.

May 7, 2009

The Smell Of Texican Whopper, Cheap Ass Whore Perfume And Stupidity Brought Them Together.

May 7th - The gentleman on the left is the Mexican Ambassador to Spain. Same guy that complained about this ad. The woman on the right pretends to be a singer and has recently launched a perfume that smells, according to our Fashion Specialists, like a "cheap ass whore".
Here they are supporting Influenza-Ridden Mexico. In Spain. Paulina is squeezing the Ambassador's crotch, and he is happy and thrilled, as we can see from the redness in his face and his signal to God.
(Picture from www.reforma.com)

May 5, 2009

In our never-ending quest for giving you the good news in Mexico City, our Research Specialists have designed this new poll for you beautiful people. It will help us to better suit your needs. It will help you to be happier. It will make this God-forsaken city a nicer place to live. Well, maybe not. But fill it anyway.
If you also want to be a part of our very special Fan Club, feel free to do so. You'll get a free surprise.

April 25, 2009


Thanks for following Mexico City News Tweeter Feed.
In order to take the most important news service of Mexico to the next level, we'd like you to give us your opinions. Please fill the Poll to your right and leave a comment below, if you feel like doing so.
If you don't answer the poll, we'll track you, we'll find you, and will contaminate your offices with Paulina Rubio's Cheap Ass Whore Perfume.